I sighed and shook my head. Another bad result. Still, the batch had to continue. It would require extra work on the end, but we couldn’t wait until Monday to finish this batch. Another late night after a day of complications. I pulled out the credit card and ordered dinner to be eaten at my desk.

           The process wasn’t finished until after 1:00 AM. I’d say Friday night, but technically, at that time, it was Saturday morning. Fortunately, I was able to leave by 8:00 PM (having been there since 7:30 AM), but I was on call for any questions the junior chemists had. Needless to say, it took a long time to get to sleep that night.

           I am, by nature, an optimistic person. I’ve had more than one person in my life call me Sunshine, (something I have in common with Anne in “Finding Sunshine” 😊). I am a scientist, and by the nature of that, I spend all my weekdays with scientists. Sadly, many of them trust far more in their data than in God. I’m blessed to have a few other Christian coworkers, and it is our responsibility to be witnesses to the rest of the team.

            It’s been a challenging year. We’re all dealing with masks and cancellations, having friends and family getting sick, and still missing out on social gatherings. On top of that, my cancer diagnosis and subsequent surgery this summer, followed by dozens of doctor’s visits and a new medication, all have taken their toll. Having everything fall apart at work has made it a little too much to handle.

            Saturday morning, I visited my mom. We sat and talked and even took some time to put a few pieces together in a jigsaw puzzle. She is a pastor, and she mentioned she wanted to run through her sermon out loud before preaching Sunday morning. I told her I’d be happy to be an audience of one if she wanted to practice in front of me.

            Her message was on light. Christmas is the time when the Light of the World became flesh. Jesus is the Light, and we are to shine His light to others. Lately I haven’t been doing a good job sharing Christ’s light. I realize we’re not called to be pretenders. It’s ok to have a sad day, or to be stressed, or to be upset by things that go wrong. But my joy and my light come from within. Even though my job is difficult and my body is not as healthy as it used to be, I am a precious child of God and will spend eternity in heaven with him, with no pandemic, no cancer, and without people stepping into my office every 15 minutes bringing new problems to my attention.

            I told my mom no matter what happened on Sunday with her sermon, God had used her to minister to me. That in itself was a good reminder to me. It doesn’t matter how many books I sell or how many people read my weekly stories. What matters is I allow God to use me and speak His words through my writing. If one person grows closer to Him through the words He’s given me, it is worth the effort. And even if no one does, it is still worth the effort because I was obedient.

            Jesus is the light, and He called us to reflect His light. After being convicted I was not doing my job to shine His light, my goal was to start the week with a new attitude. Regardless of what was going on around me, I was going to hold fast to God’s promises. He makes a promise to Israel in Isaiah 43: 1-3, but we can hold this promise for ourselves as well.  

             I haven’t spent a whole lot of time in Isaiah, but these verses jumped out at me. God is with us as the water rises, as the river rushes around us, and as the fire burns. My plan for the next several weeks is to study through Isaiah to see what God wants to teach me.

            But, now, for my experiment. As a scientist, I’m used to doing lots of experiments. 😊 I can’t say things looked too promising at first. Monday morning I woke up at 1 AM drenched in sweat (darn that cancer medication), and then at 5:30 as my husband’s snoring kicked up a notch. Still, even with a lack of sleep, I stepped into work Monday with an attitude of prayer that God would use me to shine His light. I’m thrilled to say, even though the day brought its usual challenges, I made it through with no stress. I didn’t get everything accomplished I would have liked to accomplish, the data on one project wasn’t as good as I’d hoped, but I didn’t bring anyone down. I played soft instrumental Christmas music in my office, apologized to my team for not having a positive attitude last week, and I had good discussions with several coworkers.

            I’m excited to say, I had a wonderful week. No, not everything went right, and work was still busy, but it’s amazing what a difference prayer and a positive attitude can have! I’m so thankful to God for convicting me, and thankful to my mom for being the tool He used to do so.

            Next time you feel overwhelmed by life, take a moment to pray, and although your circumstances may not change, your attitude will, and that makes all the difference. When God tells you “Do not fear, I have redeemed you, I have summoned you by name, you are mine,” He means it. You have been redeemed, and God is calling you by name to fulfill His purpose for you. And your purpose (and mine) is to shine His light!

Matthew 5: 14-16

You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.

Dear Lord, thank You for calling us by name, for calling us to be Your children. You never promise life will be easy. You don’t say You’ll be with us if we pass through the waters or the fire, You say You’ll be with us when we pass through the waters or the fire. Please help us to hold tight to that promise. 1 Peter 3:15 says “Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.” If we shine no light, no one will see the hope we have. Thank you for forgiving us when we make mistakes, Lord, and thank you for always giving us another chance to get it right. In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.