Becca slid into the chair opposite Mona and opened her lunch bag. Mona put away her phone and smiled. “I’m glad you could meet me. How is this semester going?”

Becca popped a grape into her mouth, savoring the crunchy sweetness. “Classes are going well, and I’ve joined a few clubs besides the campus ministry group.”

“I’m glad to hear it,” Mona said. “I’ve seen you with Rob at the last few small group meetings. He’s a great guy and loves the Lord. Are you two dating?”

Becca sighed. “Yeah, he’s a great guy, but I don’t think it’s going to work out.”
“Why not?”

“He doesn’t care about what’s important to me.”

Mona straightened. “I find that hard to believe. What do you mean?”

“I’m a strict vegan. How can I consider a serious relationship with someone who eats meat? It’s so wrong.”

“It’s not unbiblical to eat meat,” Mona pointed out.

“Yeah, he’s told me that. But animals are treated so cruelly. I could never live with myself if I benefitted from that cruelty.”

“And that’s fine for you,” Mona said, “but it doesn’t mean everyone else feels the same way.”

“It’s either right or it’s wrong,” Becca countered. “You can’t have it both ways.”

“I have to disagree with you,” Mona said. “Most things are either right or wrong, but there are absolutely instances where something is OK for one person but wrong for another. Even in the Bible.”

“That doesn’t make sense.” Becca popped another grape into her mouth before pulling out her salad.

“You’re eating the perfect example.”

“What? You can’t tell me I’m not allowed to eat grapes. Are the grapes harvested by exploited migrant workers? Cause I don’t want to know. I love grapes.”

Mona laughed. “No, that’s not why. Ever hear of Samson?”

“Yeah, he’s the strong guy who wasn’t supposed to cut his hair.”

“Right. He was dedicated to the Lord since birth to be a Nazarite. One of the things that set him apart was he wasn’t supposed to use a razor on his head. But there were other restrictions as well. Nazarites were required to abstain from wine and other forms of alcohol. They weren’t supposed to eat grapes or raisins or anything that came from the grapevine.”

“That’s weird. Why? What’s the point? I mean, I get the alcohol part. It’s a sin to drink alcohol, but not grapes.”

Mona raised her eyebrows. “What makes you think it’s a sin to drink alcohol?”

“Nothing good comes of it. People make stupid decisions and get into bar fights and drive drunk.”

“Some people do. Other people enjoy a glass of wine or beer with their dinner and that’s perfectly fine.”

“But doesn’t the Bible say we’re not supposed to drink?”

“Nope. It says we’re not supposed to get drunk. It doesn’t say you can’t have alcohol. Why would Jesus have changed the water into wine at the wedding if all alcohol is a sin?”

Becca pushed her lunch away. “I’m so confused. What are you saying? Am I allowed to drink and eat grapes or not? And what does this have to do with Rob?”

“The Bible has a lot to say about liberty. Alcohol is a good example. If I believe it’s OK to have a drink of wine, it’s not a sin for me to drink it. But if I go out to dinner with a friend who is a recovering alcoholic and I drink wine while I’m with them, it might tempt them to drink, thus sending them back into a cycle of dependency. If my liberty stumbles my friend, that makes it a sin.”

“OK….”

My point is, eating meat is not a sin for Rob. As for your other question, the Nazarites were supposed to be set apart and different. There’s nothing inherently wrong with eating grapes, but not eating grapes made them different. It’s the same thing with the Jewish people. God instructed the Israelites not to eat pork or shellfish, for example. It wasn’t because there’s something evil about having a ham sandwich or shrimp scampi. It was to set them apart from the pagan nations around them. You have the freedom to eat or not eat whatever you choose. And so does Rob.”

“So you think I should continue to date him?”

“Pray about it. If God blesses the relationship, don’t let something as simple as your diet get in the way. It’s not up to us to judge other people. I encourage you to go back to your dorm and read Romans 14. I think it will give you a different perspective.”

Romans 14: 1-9

Accept the one whose faith is weak, without quarreling over disputable matters. One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables. The one who eats everything must not treat with contempt the one who does not, and the one who does not eat everything must not judge the one who does, for God has accepted them. Who are you to judge someone else’s servant? To their own master, servants stand or fall. And they will stand, for the Lord is able to make them stand.

One person considers one day more sacred than another; another considers every day alike. Each of them should be fully convinced in their own mind. Whoever regards one day as special does so to the Lord. Whoever eats meat does so to the Lord, for they give thanks to God; and whoever abstains does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God. For none of us lives for ourselves alone, and none of us dies for ourselves alone. If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord. For this very reason, Christ died and returned to life so that he might be the Lord of both the dead and the living.

God, we are so grateful for Your word. It’s wonderful to have a place to go where we can find answers to our questions. Please help us refrain from judging others. Some eat meat, some drink alcohol, some dance, some play cards, some work on Sundays. Some choose to wear masks and some don’t. It’s not up to us to judge. It is up to us to love. Please help us love others the way You love them, especially those that have different perspectives than we do. In Jesus’ name, Amen.